Night Burns

Two little big boys used to sit together on the opposite side of the bus. They seemed like giants to me, at the time- back when I was soft and pink and constantly smelled of plastic perfume and salt.

They used to stare one another down, eyes disappearing behind thin eyebrows, as they bragged over who had the latest bedtime. They threw out half hours like paddles at a silent auction, each raise clipped to the tail of the last. "Well my dad lets me stay up till 9-" "Pfft, my mom lets me stay up till nine THIRTY."

 I had stared at them, across the aisle. Clutching my ugly red backpack (it wasn't pink, so it was automatically ugly by my standards), I cleared my throat and declared "My bedtime isn't till midnight."

Ink Lips, Paper Smile

Apparently, applying to high schools require certain things.

Such as essays.

Introducing, Purl Girl!

Ever since I was a fledgling knitter, there's something I've always wanted to do.
Guerrilla knitting.

Don't know what that is? Well, otherwise known as yarn bombing, graffiti knitting or yarnstorming, it looks a little something like this;

I went to a school last night.

Which was, ah

odd.


It was raining outside and I tried not to make that into an analogy. There was art along all the hallways and cauliflowers painted to look like brains and someone had painted a phrase in Gallifreyan. It was an open house, and there was a girl in a lettermen jacket, a gangly boy with bleached "coontail" bangs, a girl with fake glasses and purple Converse and a blonde boy in a plaid flannel shirt.

It felt like the opening of some Disney movie, or an equally cliched high school sitcom.

The principal had the same name as a fish, and he talked to the entire open house down in the school's basement. It was dark down there, save for the glowing window of the vending machine in the back corner. It was odd, because I've been homeschooled for 7+ years, but I think I'm going to apply.

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

I don't know what it'll be like? Going to a school. I'm just too used to being by myself all day. I won't actually go until fall, it's too late for me to apply. But still.



I have no clue what I'm doing???

You'll Be Better (You'll Be Smarter)

I was really bad for a while, this Spring. Not for any good reason. Just apathetic and disgusted and sad and confused. So I started writing skewered words and thinking patchwork thoughts and I couldn't write anything worth reading, so I slapped "hiatus" on this blog and ran away into a secret where I could be broken in relatively silent solitude. And then I became doubly disgusted at myself for being so frayed, and I started doing what I always do when under duress.

I made some lists.