Thursday, June 21, 2012

When There's Nothing Left to Burn, You Have to Set Yourself on Fire

My newest musical addiction is "Your Ex-Lover is Dead", by Stars, because holy shit this song is amazing.





It's, to be somewhat cheesy, unlike any song I've ever heard before and I am enchanted. It gives me strength, in a way? Because I'm a human, so I automatically find meaning and connections in everything (take horoscopes and psychics for example). "Live through this, and you won't look back.", "I'm not sorry I met you, I'm not sorry it's over, I'm not sorry there's nothing to save.".

It's charming and lovely and it makes me want to incorporate it into a somewhat cliche tattoo. Because I'm a teenage girl, and I want to get a tatto when this is all said and done. It's bordering on tradition in the family these days- my mother got a particularly awesome tattoo when she finished her IronMan triathlon, and just recently she actually added to it- made it more her own, (since both she and my father got matching ones) and added the line "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" on the bottom.

But I've been toying with a lot of symbolism of sorts? It's been overcast here for weeks, gray beams of sunlight struggling through the cloud cover every now and then between the occasional storms. I'm a sucker for rain, so I always go and walk and twirl and splash like a seven year old. But I saw a line recently, "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, but about learning to dance in the rain."

So now I'm thinking about making that a theme of the tattoo? A little rain cloud with a dancing figure underneath and the words "Live through this and you won't look back". Or maybe the raindrops are drops of ink, from a pen? Try to incorporate writing? I don't know. Sorry if you were expecting a quality post, this is mostly just rambling about theoretical tattoo designs.

I guess. . . I just want some proof? Some validation? Evidence that screams look at me, look at the ink seeped into my skin; look at it represent all the scars that will never show because they're from a different form of pain entirely. I want a tattoo because I want a brand, I want a scar, I want a testament to all my problems and insecurities and issues and tears and maybe I just want something solid? 
Something that will never change.

It's a nice idea, I think.

1 comment:

Claire Bagley Hayes said...

ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS... of all times, swear on all that is good and holy.